We're Selling Our Life Away

And it actually feels really good! lol You seriously have no idea how much stuff you have until you try to move it. Throw in a half remodeled house plus a 120 acre farm into the mix & you've got a great big mess on your hands! Holy cow we've got a lot of crap! But for the past week or so we've turned selling off all of our stuff into a full time job. We even met with an estate sale company to see if they could hold a big sale & get rid of the rest of our stuff for us. We're not sure yet if that'll happen, but I'm totally cool with it if we do. I'm SO done with living in chaos. I just want all of this crap gone! We've got half our life on craigslist right now, plus we're going to have another ginormous garage sale tomorrow & Saturday. After that, it's going to goodwill. Bye bye clutter!

We thought we had been living with craziness through all of the last year & a half, but I guess the pure insanity of the last couple of weeks has taken it's toll on the boys. Poor Gavin started to cry last night & it broke my heart. "When are we ever just gunna come home from school & just relax!?! I just want to watch a movie & cuddle!" Oh my gosh I could've cried myself. :'( My kid just wants to spend time with me & I can't give that to him right now. How sad is that! I tried to make him feel better & explain that our life has been crazy lately, but we're going to go to Vermont really soon & it will all be over. But to that he responded with a sob, "But then we're just trading one broken house for another! We're still going to move there & dad'll have to fix the house all day, and we'll never get to spend time together, and... and... and.." Awwww! Break my heart! So Mathew & I talked with him & explained to him that this is so very different. First of all, we'll finally have a home again. Yes we'll need to rent for a year or so, but we'll have one place to stay with all of our own stuff, and we won't have to hop from place to place every two weeks living out of duffle bags. And yes we need to remodel another house, but this time we don't have to worry about insurance companies, or inspectors, or who's going to pay us what. And we don't have to worry about much more than taking the walls down & putting them back up the way we want it. And that this time it'll actually be fun for us because it's something that we chose, not something that happened to us that we weren't prepared for. And, when it's all said & done, we'll have a forever home. A beautiful place we'll stay for a long time & just be a family. He seemed to be okay with that. And I am too.

So as Mathew is manning the garage sale by himself tomorrow & Saturday, I will be wrapping up my last two days at a job that I love with friends that I've made over the last 9+ years that I may never see again. It's going to be tough. :(